A Little South of Sanity

I mentioned a few days ago that I had banned a particular someone who continued to leave inappropriate comments in spite of me asking nicely and then warning him not to. I did end up having to ban an entire ip range, and hopefully am not keeping anyone out but him, but the possibility is there.

On the other site that I do not own, where I link various entries, I closed comments so that he couldn’t comment there, even though he couldn’t read the entries. Obviously, that wasn’t enough either- This morning I had a notification of an email from him on that same site…His note said he had been banned from my websites by someone (duh) and that he wanted to say hello.

I’m fairly certain he can read this if he has access to my rss feed, and I’m not opposed to him reading, but I am opposed to his or any other comments with innuendo. I don’t understand why people can’t be respectful.

I didn’t respond to his message at the other site, and I won’t. I’m sure it won’t be long though, and he’ll try to contact me somewhere else.

This is the reason I never put my real name out there for the world to see. I’ve been accused in the past of ‘hiding’ things, which I find humorous.. because a person has a right to privacy and to release what personal information THEY choose to share with others. I have online friends that I’ve known online for years and I still don’t know their real name, because they choose not to share that personal information with people online. I respect that and it doesn’t bother me at all. I don’t understsand why it does others.

I spend many years working as an advocate for educating and helping people protect themselves online. Sadly, people still feel that if it happens online, they are safe. Trust me, nothing could be further from the truth.

Take it from someone who was stalked by someone who found out my personal information in an online profile, used it to get my phone number and address. You never know… THAT is why I’m careful, and why you should be too.

Yes, there are people who have my real name, and even my address, but those are people I know and trust without a doubt, but you won’t find my address in google if you knew where to look.

I’ve had to ban my first person from my sites.. They can’t say they weren’t warned, but yet they continued leaving inappropriate comments, most of which y’all didn’t have the opportunity to see, because I deleted them before they ever hit the comment airwaves.

I’m not sure that they’re complately banned, but I think that I’ve finally banned their entire ip range, so that should have done the trick. If not- I’ll keep adding until I do. I hate that I’ve had to ban the entire range, since it could be locking someone else out who is innocent of any ignorant acts, but that’s what happens on dynamic ip’s.

Unfortunately, this person will probably start emailing me, since they’ve been attempting access to my facebook AND myspace for quite some time, and wonder if they realize that this is technically considered stalking.

I also wonder if they have any idea that I spent almost 4 years of my life working in the online safety sector and know the laws regarding cyber stalking?

I hate being mean to people, and try to treat everyone the same, but when lines continue to be crossed, and people can’t respect me- then it’s time to draw the line in the sand…

The line has been drawn. Now, I just hope he’ll stay away so that I don’t have to take other measures.

I really don’t understand the fixation anyway- I’m not that fascinating

I was telling someone earlier this week, that it’s difficult to remember how we ever managed without computers and cell phones, and how the generations growing up now, will never know what it’s like to write ‘real’ letters- you know the ones- the almost ancient technique of actually putting pen to paper and writing words, sealing them in an envelope, sticking a stamp on an envelope addressed to your favorite person or persons.

In the age of ‘e-everything’, who wants to take the time to actually wait for a letter to arrive, when with the click of a mouse and a few taps of the keyboard, those ‘words’ can arrive almost instantaneously? I’ll admit- as much as I love the instant gratification of the technology age, there is nothing better than receiving a hand written card or letter in the mail- not email, but the old fashioned way; delivered by Mr. Postman himself.

Even though I belong to My Space, Facebook, Twitter, and countless other Social Networking sites, as much as I enjoy them- I don’t enjoy anything more than actually picking up the phone and calling my family and friends. There’s something that all the Facebooks and MySpaces in the world can’t beat- and that’s the personalization of a real phone call. I know- there are even programs for that, such as Skype, and while I do have it installed on my computer, I’ve never used it, because in that sense, I’m old fashioned and like to rely on “Ma Bell” for my phone calls. Thank God for great phone rates.

As great as all this socal networking is- it isn’t without it’s problems. After all, do we really want to be in touch with EVERYONE from our past? I don’t. I’ll admit that more often than not, I”m thrilled to be in touch with old friends, and have enjoyed reconnecting and re-establishing friendships with some, and there are others that are better left in the past. Social networking sites are also a gathering ground for predators, which is one of the reasons that I do not have my ‘real’ last name on Facebook. My last name is very much ficticious, but those who know me, can find me by searching for my last name, which is hidden from the rest of the world. Some may call it paranoid, I call it smart- I know what it’s like to be stalked by someone who was less than stable, both online and off. It’s easier than you think for people to get personal information by paying attention to the ‘little things’.

Aside from the predators, there are also those wanna be hackers and phishers, who have far too much time on their hands, or are disgruntled at themselves or possibly even life- CNN.com reported that facebook stopped yet another phishing attack that happened yesterday, with the possiblities of more on the horizon.

As with everything else in life- education IS key to being safe both online and off. There are ways to protect yourself that are little more than common sense, and above all else, don’t trust everything and everyone you see and hear.

If you have any questions on how to protect yourself online (don’t ever be fooled by thinking because you’re online, your safe from becoming a victim- that would be your first mistake) please feel free to drop me a line anytime. In the weeks ahead, I’ll be adding more information on how not to fall prey to online predators, phishing attacks, and other cyber crimes.