A Little South of Sanity

I wasn’t sure I was going to write about this- simply because it was too hard to swallow at the time- and I wasn’t sure I wanted it ‘out here’ to be able to reflect on later. Then I decided that maybe it would be better if I did.

Earlier this week- I was up late and an episode of Numb3rs came on. I was playing Flight Control (my latest guilty pleasure) on the iPad and I heard the song Drift Away come on. I froze- my planes crashed ending my game and I started crying. It was only a clip- but that one clip took me back to a moment in time. A moment many years ago when the Michael Bolton cd came out and he’d remade that song- I remember riding with Carol and her saying that she loved her ‘man’ Michael and the two of us singing that song at the top of our lungs- laughing and enjoying the moment. It was a moment in time that was so special to me- and one that I hadn’t thought of in years.

After the clip- I found the song on You Tube and watched the entire thing- I cried in a way I haven’t cried in years- and it was as though the reality of her passing was being told to me for the very first time- I was heartbroken, sick, and angry all at the same time. I wanted to open my eyes to realize that it was all a dream and that I could pick up the phone and call her- and she would be able to laugh along with me at that moment in time when we were so silly and didn’t have a care in the world. That wasn’t to be the case- She’s gone- and I miss her.

I hold those moments close though- the special ones that nothing can ever take away.

The following morning I felt really as though I had been hit by a truck- and I hadn’t told but one person about what had happened. It was as though God was smiling down upon me and giving me exactly what I needed though- because I had a special text message from my sister- then a phone call to Bobbi and my brother- then a visit from Desere- I also had a package delivery- first was one with a beautiful sunflower card and two wonderful cupcake cookbooks from my dear friend M. It was a completel surprise and I was thrilled- Then later- when Desere was still here- I had another delivery- this also from M. and a package filled with cake and muffin tins- recipe sheets, a wonderful spatula and a shopping list notepad.. It was just what the doctor ordered for my soul… and I’m so grateful.

What would you think if someone you know doesn’t exactly love you gave you a plant that they know you’re allergic to? It would leave you wondering wouldn’t it?

That happened to me yesterday and while I do love this particular plant- the bloom from the plant makes me sick. Of course, this person has been told this in the past- and I’m not going to believe that they did it intentionally, although it would make one wonder. I guess that’s what life is full of- things that make you go hmmm..

So tell me- what would you think?

I chose to accept it graciously and I’ll just set it outside so I don’t have the effects from it but can still enjoy the beauty.

A friend of mine emailed me a few days ago. She said she’d been perusing the National Camp Association website and asked what I thought about her sending her oldest daughter to summer camp this year. She lives on the East Coast and said that she was around this age when she started going to summer camp and she thought it would be fun for her daughter. She remembers her time at summer camp as being amongst her favorite memories and really believes that it’s something that her daughter should also experience. Some of the friendships she formed as a child are friends that she still has to this day. I can tell what a positive imprint it has made on her life and can see why it’s important to share that tradition with her daughter.

Since I didn’t have the opportunity to go as a child- I couldn’t share in her experiences, but I’ll admit- I can’t see it as being anything but a wonderful experience for Leslie. Leslie is already a huge fan of the outdoors and loves being active and meeting new people, so I think that sending her to one of the better Adirondack Camps in New York would be great. Since they also don’t generally take a family vacation, this will also give Leslie an outting and a little fun and relaxation before she starts back to school again in August. It sounds to me like the perfect way to spend your summer vacation. Something I also think is the friends she meets she can always spend time catching up with via email- social networks or even through telephone calls or Skype if they happen not to live in the immediate area. It’s much different than when my friend was growing up and the way to keep in touch was pen and paper only.

I am excited to see how this plays out for Leslie- This may end up being her first summer camp, but I know it won’t be her last.

I love my friends- I also love my family- some of which are blood related and some of which I’ve chosen as my family even though we aren’t technically related.

I love that I can always count on certain people in my life- and have taken to learning from those who ‘claim’ to be a friend, but in reality- I’ve found out otherwise. It’s one of those thorns in the rose- but it’s also something that it good to know. People who love me accept me- for me- all my quirks and such. That means more than I can ever express.

Today has been a great and productive day- yet at the same time- I still know that there is a lot that I really need to accomplish. I know I shouldn’t be hard on myself about it- but I find that I am and think that I probably could have got more done if I’d gotten an earlier start to my day.

I’ve felt a little like basement flooring, which I know is an odd analogy- I’ve just been ‘there’ in the mornings and could be walked over without much protest. The good and positive thing is once I get moving- I’m bursting with energy- Like right now. Dinner is in the oven and I’m ready to take on the world. If only that would come a little earlier in the day.

I love Facebook, but sometimes there are things that I read on there that leave me shaking my head and wondering about the people who write them. I have asked myself the question on countless occasions if people ‘think’ before tapping out those words and pressing enter- and based on some of the things I see, I know that they do not.

I’m a firm believer that everything you wanted to know and didn’t want to know can be found on Facebook. It’s a great platform, but I guess in some cases- it’s a place for people to really share their intelligence, or lack thereof. What do you think?

Knowing me personally is knowing that digital photography is one of my great loves in life. I started pre-digital camera days with photography and quickly fell in love. I consider myself to be somewhat old school when it comes to most images as I like to keep them as close to the original image as possible. I know some people would disagree- but it’s just me. I love technology- but I think it’s taken away the true artform of photography- because any good editing program can make a difference in how a photo looks, but I digress.

One of my goals this year is to spend more time with my digital camera. I play around with my iPhone quite a lot because it’s always with me, but I would really like to spend some time working with my lenses and really seeing what they can do. I have used them and taken some good shots- but I know I’m not using them to their full potential. Something else I’ve also decided that I’d like to do is purchase some new equipment, which includes me looking at monopods. I have a great tri-pod that I use on occasion, but I think a monopod would bring something else to the scene for me. Often times I want to get into a tight area that just won’t work with a tri-pod and I think it would be perfect. Have you ever tried getting a great shot in a very small area? It’s pretty difficult to keep a steady hand- if not impossible. So, it’s made my list of ‘wants’ to help me attain my goal of spending more time developing my photography this year.

I’m also hoping that this will be the year that I get that perfect lightning shot- I’ve been trying for years (since the film days) and haven’t quite got it. But all I need is the right moment and it will happen. I’m sure of it.

I was having some site issues earlier, which put me behind schedule for updating and reading blogs. I ended up spending several hours trying to get things sorted and in the end (thankfully), I was able to get it all back in operational order, although exactly what I did- I have no idea.

I had some things I wanted to share- but unfortunately they are things that are going to take much longer to type out than I have time for, so I’ll plan to share tomorrow. I have that funny story that I still haven’t shared- and it’s about time that I do so.

In the meantime- tell me what’s been going on with you?

I was out walking today with my favorite (and only) pup, JJ and we ended up behind two men in the park who were chatting away and puffing on cigars. I couldn’t help but laugh at JJ because he lifted his head and looked around trying to see where the different smell was coming from, at least until he got distracted by a bird landing in the field we were walking past. He ended up jumping in the canal to go after a couple of sticks, so when we got home- he took another swim- only this time in the bathtub. He loved it so much, and again- his antics had me in stitches.

I’m really tired tonight after doing a really hard work out, plus a few other things in house today. I thought I would relax on the couch for a while and spend a little time catching up on some of my favorite blogs and writing in my own, but I’ll admit that I’m just about too tired to do even that- so it looks like I’m going to have to cut it short. I’m going to curl up on the sofa with a movie after I take a couple Ibuprofen and hopefully make it an early night tonight.

I’ll try to check in again tomorrow and maybe then I can actually get some of the things accomplished that I was hoping to get done today.